Wednesday, 11 November 2009

  • I just want to enjoy eating...-Please- Help!

    I developed anorexia a couple years ago and have battled with it on and off since. I've always liked food - and  I still do. But I don't like it when it's in my stomach. My biggest fear is gaining weight, as I'm a dancer. So when I eat, I feel guilty and ashamed; recently, I've been in a huge battle with myself. I want to restrict and get back to my weight before ever receiving treatment. Right now, I'm 5 ft, and about 90-95 founds. A couple weeks ago, I was in the 80's. 80's is the comfortable weight range for me, but 90's makes me mad. It makes me want to not eat. I have a hard time restricting because I like to eat, but I feel guilty, fat, ugly, etc, when I do.

    Honestly guys, I need some advice. I can't go to counseling (insurance won't cover any further sessions). And I need to figure out how to eat and not feel guilty about it. I want to enjoy eating. I don't want to fight with myself all the time.

    Please help.
    -Kessa

Thursday, 05 November 2009

  • i'm going to try to estimate the calorie intake as best as i can.

    breakfast:
    1 piece of bread toasted (100 cals)

    lunch:
    1/4 of a tag (100 cals)

    dinner:
    sundance cone (250 cals)
    1 cup of candy (100 cals)
    4 pieces of popcorn chicken (50 cals)

    total: 500 cals

    pretty disgusted with my intake.
    tomorrow MUST be better!
    and i'm really tempted to eat another sundae cone...

Wednesday, 04 November 2009

  • breakfast intake

    1 cup of ginger ale - about 60 cals
    1/3 cup of frozen fruit - about 30
    total for breakfast: 90 cals
    remaining: 410 cals

  • ABC diet

    I'm going to start the ABC diet today.
    For those that don't know what it is, it's a day by day plan and you follow these cal counts:

    day1: 500 calories(or less)
    day2: 500 calories(or less)
    3:300 calories
    4:400 calories
    5: 100 calories
    6: 200 calories
    7: 300 calories
    8: 400 calories
    9: 500 calories
    10: fast
    11: 150 calories
    12: 200 calories
    13: 400 calories
    14: 350 calories
    15: 250 calories
    16: 200 calories
    17: fast
    18: 200 calories
    19: 100 calories
    20: fast
    21: 300 calories
    22: 250 calories
    23: 200 calories
    24: 150 calories
    25: 100 calories
    26: 50 calories
    27: 100 calories
    28: 200 calories
    29: 200 calories
    30: 300 calories
    31: 800
    32: fast
    33: 250 calories
    34: 350 calories
    35: 450 calories
    36: fast
    37: 500 calories
    38: 450 calories
    39: 400 calories
    40: 350 calories
    41: 300 calories
    42: 250 calories
    43: 200 calories
    44: 200 calories
    45: 250 calories
    46: 200 calories
    47: 300 calories
    48: 200 calories
    49: 150 calories
    50: fast


    anyone want to join me?
    will record today's intake when i get home. no ballet tonight.
    xx kess

Tuesday, 03 November 2009

  • EMERGENCY help needed!

    i need to lose weight. if you're here to judge, just leave. don't tell me it's unhealthy, blah blah blah. frankly, i don't give a damn. i just want to lose weight.
    i'm starting ABC. i made a promise to myself that tomorrow i'm starting it. i'll post the ABC list later.

    i need something to make myself throw up incase i slip up.
    is there something at the drug store i can get?

    i can't just stick my finger or anything down my throat.

    PLEASE guys. i'm desperate!
    -kess

  • looking for a low calorie snack that's filling?

    hey guys.
    if anyone is looking for low cal snacks that are filling but are low cal, here's a few!

    -water crackers (light, thin, crackers made from sunflower oil.) - 60 cals per 3 crackers
    -mini rice cakes (i got these in a chocolate flavor and they were DELICIOUS!) - 60 cals per 7 cakes
    -popcorn (no salt or butter) - 30 cals per 1 cup

    hope this can help someone x_o

    todays goal:
    -liquid fast. apple juice and ginger ale/3 cigarettes.

    have a good day all!

Sunday, 01 November 2009

Saturday, 31 October 2009

Tuesday, 27 October 2009

  • Invisible Children - Make Them Seen (Please Read & Rec - For A Cause)

     

    A child goes missing in the United States. The police are notified and they issue what in America is referred to as an Amber Alert.  Radio stations begin broadcasting descriptions, while TV stations flash pictures of both the kidnapper and the missing child across the screen. The police, and sometimes the National Army Guard, quickly respond to the situation and take all actions needed. Everything is put into operation to bring a child home to its family.  At the same time, they go after the abductor to put him behind bars, so she or he cannot harm any other child. In the northern districts of Uganda, 30,000 children have been abducted in the past 20 years. A vast majority of families in Acholi and Langi have been affected. These abductions were made by one single man and his army. This is the story of Joseph Kony and the Children Soldiers.


    The LRA, Lord’s Resistance Army, is led by a man named Joseph Kony.  Joseph Kony and his army have a mission of establishing a theocratic government and are referred to as “the rebels.” This group was founded in 1986 and has abducted over 30,000 children and displaced almost 2 million people. The LRA has been accused of acts of human rights violations which include, but are not limited to, murder, abduction, mutilation, sexual enslavement of women and children, and forcing children to partake of hostilities.

    The ideology is largely mysterious due to lack of communication on the subject, and though there have been many efforts to search for Joseph Kony and his army, he is still out in rein, abducting and displacing children and women. In Uganda and surrounding areas, adults and children alike lived in fear of the violent attacks of the LRA. Parents lived in fear that their children would be abducted and forced to fight with the rebel army. Children are used as walking weapons and are victims of the cold-hearted man who put them there.In 2006, a group of US Trained Guatemalan Special Ops soldiers were sent to assassinate Kony, but instead all of them were killed by Kony's men.

    December 28, 2008: The Ugandan Army reported that the LRA “hacked to death” 45 people in a church in northeastern Democratic Republic of Congo. An army spokesman, Captain Chris Magezi, reported the following despcrition of the massacre: "There are body parts everywhere. Inside the church, the entrance, and in the church compound. We got information the rebels cut 45 people into pieces." This event, among with others that took place during the Christmas season, was reffed to as the Christmas Massacres. There were an estimated of 500 victims to the Christmas Massacres, lead by Joseph Kony and the LRA.



    Your Help is Needed!

    This war has been ongoing and is one of Africa’s longest conflicts of this extreme, yet it receives little attention. It has been in my heart since I read “First Kill Your Family: First Kill Your Family: Child Soldiers of Uganda and the Lord's Resistance Army.” I am doing outreaches throughout my school, community, and church to spread the story and inform people of this war. You can too! I have found a GREAT website with everything to need to know about getting involved and spreading the story. The website is linked below, along with a petition link.


    Thanks everyone for taking the time to read this, and I hope this post has given you some information. There are many ways you can get involved, and I strongly encourage you to visit the website below – InvisibleChildren.com. Thanks again for reading, it is very much appreciated.


     
    Click Here to Sign The Petition 

     Spread the story on Xanga
    You can use this ribbon to advertise InvisibleChildren.com. Also, please tell your friends about this post and reccomend!!  


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kessainthemirror

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    • Name: Kessa
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 4/12/2009

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  • Sticks and stones will break her bones but words will make her starve herself to death.

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